Dear Kaya,
I write this to you today on the eve of Jimi’s passing and leaving us for the other side.
He loved you little girl…more than you may ever know! He always said he didn’t want children as he had enough of the nieces and nephews. But, I think he was pretending to be strong. I think he was actually grieving an unknown loss of never having children himself. You became joy in his world and a love never known.
When you came into our picture, his heart exploded and I watched a rough, tough man become a soft whisper of bliss. He told everyone “she was born in my kitchen” and although you were small and fragile, he would hold you with his beaten hands with such tenderness.
He’d give his life for you. He wanted to be a part of you, teach you, guide you and love you. You were truly the only one who could instantly soften his heart. It was beautiful to see and witness. He always made time for you…stopped and was present to you. I want you to know this little one…so you remember!
Jimi had a huge heart that was often hidden behind this tough guy. You broke through! I have a sense he will be your guardian angel and mine too. We will share that together. He will be with us! One day, you will return and I will remind you of him and share the gift he gave us both. I am sharing him now publicly so you have the words left to discover! You were a silver thread in his being that cracked open the deep love and I am honored you came through my lineage.
Before Jimi passed, you were taken from us under very hurtful circumstances. Jimi’s pain was compounded by my pain. You were kept from us and hidden from us. We both tried. We both begged. We both waited and held the possibility of your return in our hearts, patiently. Human’s can hurt and harm. Before Jimi’s surgery, we were given an opportunity to talk to you via skype. Do you remember? It was very touching for both of us. We loved seeing you but also he felt the heartache he might not see you again.
Jimi left with this deep pain but he asked me to keep the spark of you alive on our land…his gift. I promise I will. After he passed, I came to the ocean as this is a space of healing for me. I tried to see you. It did not happen. I did have a glimpse of you from afar..you did not see me.
One day we will share! Jimi and I set in motion a dedication to you. One day you will know what that means. We both want you to grow, learn, understand and realize the beauty of nature and living a life close to nature. Our intentions in this dedication is to remove the darkness of greed and self gratification. Our intention is so that in your wisdom, you will know what is right. You will discover this as time ticks in your life.
You will know how much I loved you…and Pepe. I will hold space and wait, patiently as is necessary to pass it all to you. In this world of uncertainty, you have a foundation. I will care for it until you return and decide to continue with me. I will continue for you…through and with Jimi, Pepe!
Before Jimi passed, I
